How To Talk About Myself In A Dating Site
I thought I’d share these letters that a paid for dating site sends me. I really do love them all, they press good buttons and if there was an iota of truth in any of them they would probably have me falling head over heals for them. But that’s okay, because you’ll save yourself the trouble of dating someone who didn’t accept you as you are. Think of it as Practice. I know it sounds like silly advice, but just think of your first date like dating practice! It’ll keep the pressure away. When you talk about yourself on a date, it’s not a test. An online dating site is an interesting portal to meet new people, and join groups with like-minded individuals. It is an opportunity to dip your feet into the dating networking pool, meant for those interested in meeting singles online. Many people may have an apprehensive approach to this idea, that with weirdos stalking these dating websites. Humility is surely a better quality than narcissism, but constructing a profile for an online dating site requires you to toot your own horn a bit. In the online space, you’re the only person to talk yourself up—there’s no wingman to do the bragging for you.
What are the best words to describe yourself on a dating app? Zoosk analyzed 4,000 of its members and found some of the best words to describe yourself on your dating profile.
The surprising findings from Zoosk include words about your past relationships as well as your family. Honesty is the best policy for men. Let's look at the best words men should use on their profiles.
Zoosk found men who had the following words on their profile’s received 52% MORE messages from women:
- Divorce
- Separated
- My ex
These words work because women value men who are honest and modest. Use the words above in a positive fashion. You don't want to come across as bitter and jaded.
Here’s how you use these words on your dating profile:
GOOD -> 'It's been over two years ago since my divorce, and I'm here for a passionate, long-term relationship.'
BAD -> 'I'm so glad I got a divorce from that hell hound I dated.'
GOOD -> 'I have an amazing son and share custody of him with my ex…'
BAD -> 'Please be drama free. If you're here to play games like my ex, don't message me!'
Men who had the following words on their dating profiles received 7% MORE messages from women:
- Son
- Daughter
- Teenager
- Children
- Single dad
- Single mom
Why these words work: Women value family. Nothing is sexier to a woman than a man whose a good dad and has strong family values.
You may think 7% isn't a large number, but it's better than zero. These words can give you a little boost if they apply to you.
For example, when you introduce yourself, you can write, 'I'm Chris, I'm a single dad who is…' and take it from there. Or you could use the word in a sentence like this:
“On the weekend, I enjoy coaching my son in Lacrosse. It allows me to spend more time with him, I have fun doing it, and I get to teach him valuable life lessons through the sport.”
When you write about yourself, keep it positive. You don't want to write something like this: 'Raising a teenager is tough' or say anything negative. Women aren't attracted to negative dating profiles.
Don’t overdo it when talking about your kids, though. A couple of sentences is all you need. You want to show women you’re a great dad but don’t want to make it appear you’re so involved with your kids you don’t have time to date.
Honesty is the ideal approach to describing yourself on your dating profile. The best words to describe yourself are words that give honest insight to yourself.
The ideal approach in your self-summary is honesty. The best words to describe yourself include talking about your past relationships and your family.
Why are these words effective? The words provide depth and greater insight into your life than most men share in their bios.
Most men write the same thing on their profiles; 'I enjoy traveling, Netflix and nights out but nights in.' Also, online dating has a stigma of men lying about themselves on their profiles.
One study found 81% of people lie about something on their dating profile. So, it’s refreshing for women when men are honest about themselves.
Now that Zoosk has given you the best words to describe yourself on your dating profile sprinkle a few on your dating profile.
If you want to know another sneaky trick regarding a word that has been PROVEN to increase response rates from women, use the word 'whom' on your dating profile. Check out my blog post where I share the results of a study detailing why you should use 'whom' in your bio.
Feel free to comment below on what you think about the best words to describe yourself on your dating profile are.
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It's not always the social butterfly who lands the date—there are plenty of people out there who will mesh perfectly with your introverted self. We've gathered the best tips to help you catch the interest of a potential match while still staying true to who you are!
Steps Download Article
- 1Choose a Username and Tagline
- Your username, unlike your tagline or photo, is something that usually is unchangeable – so pick carefully. It will represent who you are throughout the site so something clever will score you points, while something raunchy will only attract the wrong type of people. Most sites also offer a Heading/Catch Phrase/Tag Line that appears in the searches to draw people into your profile. Humor often works best. It engages people by creating a reaction in their mind of laughter, a pleasure-seeking bait of wanting to laugh more if they read what else you have to say. I myself used: “We can always say we met at the supermarket“, or something quirky like: “Seeking out all the toilet paper scrunchers!“
- 2Choose a Photo.
- A lot of us introverts are camera shy but having a photo is essential for any online dating profile. In most sites you can choose to filter people out without a photo. Whenever someone performs a search for a match, the only details that appear in the search results are your username, age, location, tagline and your photo. So what will make a person take more interest in learning more about you than any of the other 50 profiles in the search result? How attractive they find you. Selecting a photo with someone significantly less attractive than yourself would create the perfect perceptual contrast of increasing your appeal.
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Method 1 of 1:For the more ethical introverts Download Article
- 1Select a photo with someone significantly less attractive than yourself would create the perfect perceptual contrast of increasing your appeal. But for the more ethical:
- Current photos are ideal. Many people use old photos of their former and more attractive selves. It’s an ingenious idea at the beginning… until you have to meet the person you’re talking with, and have to reassure them that they didn’t sleep in and arrive 20 years late for your date…
- More than one photo allows for people to get a more three dimensional idea of what you look like in different contexts. Preferably include at least one head shot and one full body shot.
- Be original and grab people's attention to receive higher responses. This could be perfect if you’re a bit shy and don’t want to show a picture of yourself. For example, you could put one picture up of you wearing a costume, or one where you draw a smiley face on a piece of paper and cover your face with it. These kinds of pictures will add a touch of quirky playfulness, while adding a sense of mystery so that people want more.
- Details in picking the image will make all the difference. If you’re aiming at attracting geeks or nerds then photos with your glasses on or playing your favorite video games will work wonders. If you’d like an adventurer like yourself, a photo of yourself rock climbing is perfect. Also keep in mind the small things like lighting in the photo, clothes you’re wearing and even the size of your pupils. A psychology study analyzing pupil sizes discovered that we find large pupils more inviting and attractive, just as I mentioned in another article.
- 2Write Your ‘About Me’
- Show people your personality, don’t describe it. How often have you seen the same repetitive: “I love to have fun and be spontaneous!!!“, as opposed to what? Not liking to have fun? And saying you’re spontaneous makes it sound planned. Listing sports, movies, music and travel as your interests is uninteresting, most people like a certain sport, movie, song or place to go to. Also, generalizing your tastes by saying for instance “I like all kinds of music” is just a falsified cover-up to make yourself appear that you’re cultured, when in fact you’re actually dispassionate and boring. Writing: “I like to visit India because it’s such an ancient culture rich with variety, spirituality, acceptance and color” would be much more revealing of who you are. Here are some helpful hints:
- 3Fill out as many of the basic details as you can, the more specific the information is, the more options people will have of narrowing you down using the search filters: Wants Kids, Aries and so on.
- The opening lines are pivotal for the success of your self bio. Just like in many writing formats, how you open your paragraphs will either hook your reader in and entice them to read further or will dull them away. It will be difficult, but craft the first sentence very carefully.
- 4Don't make it too long or too short. The length should preferably be around 300 words. The internet generation is one of impatience, nobody likes reading 3-mouse-scroll-downs lengths of text. Too little text however and you’ll come across as empty, lazy, lifeless and boring. Too much and you’re obsessive, psycho and neurotic.
- 5Check your spelling and have someone else check your spelling. Spelling is one of the pet-peeves of many. Spelling words correctly makes your writing flow a lot more smoothly, as does using punctuation and new paragraphs. If your reader unconsciously feels the tension of having to decipher your spelling mistakes, then that anxiety will also influence their perception of you. Furthermore, your choice of words can change the meaning of what you want to convey entirely. “I don’t want to die alone” is a common fear. “I want someone to die with” is a suicide pact.
- 6Show why it is that you posses the qualities that you value. If you consider yourself caring, instead of writing that, why not share that you enjoy cooking for your parents or coaching your nephews soccer team?
- 7Mention your aspirations and passions throughout your profile. For instance: what it is you aspire to do in life, what hobbies bring you the greatest joy, what qualities you value in others. The more important things you reveal about yourself, whether favorite movie or favorite ice cream flavor, the more chances someone will read your profile and think: “wow, this person sounds so much like me“.
- 8Avoid negative phrasing, it makes you appear close-minded, cold and superficial. Instead of stating: “No old creepy men”, “I’d like someone around my age to be able to grow old with” sounds much more warm and positive. Instead of “No non-christians”, “My religion plays a huge role in my life” is much more welcoming.
- 9Consider this: what is it that makes you so worthy of being contacted when there are thousands of other fish in the search results? Be unique.Advertisement
Community Q&A
What Should I Say About Myself On A Dating App
Tips
- Let your readers identify with you and feel they aren’t alone in their quirks and tastes. If you leave them smiling or questioning what else there is to discover about you, your profile will be memorable. Remember to make the experience fun!Thanks!
Warnings
- This article was republished with permission of the original authors and can be originally found at http://lonerwolf.comThanks!